Transcript for Twinkies
Jan. 3rd, 2011 06:27 pmHello, Zevran here. Hope you're having a fine day, as I am not. It has recently been brought to my attention that there are many mods. Now, this I knew as Alistair is constantly taking it about a million different ways that are probably not even physically possible - hey, if I haven't done it it probably isn't possible -
So, yes. Mods. I know there are mods. I take nooo issue with this at all, please, be merry and play with everything as much as you will. I like being played with. A lot.
But, some of the.... hair mods. Those, those have been brought to my attention. Now, granted, my original hair looks like someone went at me with a weed-whacker, so I could probably do with a little upkeep.
Most of them, I'm fine with. But there are one or two... that... they just.. make me look like ah, what's the word I"m looking for cara? Oh yes – 'twink'
So, I look like a twink in this particular hair styles I've seen. Now, alright, I don't mind a good poke - in any way shape or form. A good poke is a good poke, yes? So. But I look at it and I feel like... I should be wearing too much mascara and eyeliner, in nothing more than a weather beaten half open silk robe standing on a corner.
Saying something like "Heloooo boys.... Zevran can give you a goood timeee..... three silvers – it's a real bargain!"
And that later on when I go to my pimp with no real earnings for the day he smacks me around telling me I'm too old and used up, and look like a dumb hussy. While I'm crying and my eyemake up is running down my face in absolutely prideless pathetic gooey rivulets, saying "But I gave you the best years of my life! I'm beautiful! BEAUTIFUL I TELL YOU! Aiee-UGH!"
SO please, be kind to me, and don't make me feel like I should be like that.... Love your Zevrans, give them the good stuff, yes?
But if you want me to look like a twink, I shall make you a voice set, of me being a washed up, desiccated, old whore, long past his prime. Of course it will contain the obligatory, “OMG I just chipped a nail” and “Stand back bitches or I'll get you with my nail file,” and of course “I will cut you!” as well as my personal favorite, “OMG you're such a slut!”
And as a bonus, “I can do things with my tongue that you wouldn't believe.” Which, actually actually happens to be true.
Along with, “Don't worry about that rash dear, my healer just said it was love butterflies.”
And as a last extra special package, the always popular with the fans of day time talk shows, “Back off bitch – that's my man!”
Of course, that voice set will alos make me feel like I am talking like a freakish mix of chola, yenta, and crack whore.
That is all – Zevran out.
So, yes. Mods. I know there are mods. I take nooo issue with this at all, please, be merry and play with everything as much as you will. I like being played with. A lot.
But, some of the.... hair mods. Those, those have been brought to my attention. Now, granted, my original hair looks like someone went at me with a weed-whacker, so I could probably do with a little upkeep.
Most of them, I'm fine with. But there are one or two... that... they just.. make me look like ah, what's the word I"m looking for cara? Oh yes – 'twink'
So, I look like a twink in this particular hair styles I've seen. Now, alright, I don't mind a good poke - in any way shape or form. A good poke is a good poke, yes? So. But I look at it and I feel like... I should be wearing too much mascara and eyeliner, in nothing more than a weather beaten half open silk robe standing on a corner.
Saying something like "Heloooo boys.... Zevran can give you a goood timeee..... three silvers – it's a real bargain!"
And that later on when I go to my pimp with no real earnings for the day he smacks me around telling me I'm too old and used up, and look like a dumb hussy. While I'm crying and my eyemake up is running down my face in absolutely prideless pathetic gooey rivulets, saying "But I gave you the best years of my life! I'm beautiful! BEAUTIFUL I TELL YOU! Aiee-UGH!"
SO please, be kind to me, and don't make me feel like I should be like that.... Love your Zevrans, give them the good stuff, yes?
But if you want me to look like a twink, I shall make you a voice set, of me being a washed up, desiccated, old whore, long past his prime. Of course it will contain the obligatory, “OMG I just chipped a nail” and “Stand back bitches or I'll get you with my nail file,” and of course “I will cut you!” as well as my personal favorite, “OMG you're such a slut!”
And as a bonus, “I can do things with my tongue that you wouldn't believe.” Which, actually actually happens to be true.
Along with, “Don't worry about that rash dear, my healer just said it was love butterflies.”
And as a last extra special package, the always popular with the fans of day time talk shows, “Back off bitch – that's my man!”
Of course, that voice set will alos make me feel like I am talking like a freakish mix of chola, yenta, and crack whore.
That is all – Zevran out.
Bring it Bitches - Transcript
Dec. 30th, 2010 05:59 amTrascript:
Used with permission of![[profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
estarashirai, modified and spoken by me.
Step back haters, because this is Zevran. Do you think your character has a sob story? Well shut the fuck up! Because I own your ass and I'm going to tap it! I'm going to get all up in that sweet ass and - oh. Right. Sob story.
So, my dad was some loser knife ear from Antiva where they can't even pick a motherfucking accent until they decide if they're mafia or Russian mob. He died of some nasty ass disease, so my whore mother took up goddamned pregnant whoring because you can't go back to the Dalish after that shit. And then she died giving birth to this much fucking awesome that I am, so I grew up with the whores. At least until they sold my sweet elven ass to the Crows, who tortured the fucking shit out of me and then gave me knives. Which I used which I used to kill my first true fucking love, when she didn't even need killing.
So now, one slip, and instead of fucking Loghain in a pile of money, I'm following your candy-ass around, and soaking up all the hate mail from the phobes. Meanwhile Leliana is up to her neck in hair pies, and Alistair is taking it eight ways to Sunday by m!Cousland in the mods! So fuck you!
No - seriously I will fuck you clear into next week if you want me to. Any race, any origin, any class, any gender, anywhere, any time. How do you like it? I know shit that's not even in the kama fucking sutra, and all of my massages come with release.
SO - bring it the hell on bitches.
Used with permission of
estarashirai, modified and spoken by me.Step back haters, because this is Zevran. Do you think your character has a sob story? Well shut the fuck up! Because I own your ass and I'm going to tap it! I'm going to get all up in that sweet ass and - oh. Right. Sob story.
So, my dad was some loser knife ear from Antiva where they can't even pick a motherfucking accent until they decide if they're mafia or Russian mob. He died of some nasty ass disease, so my whore mother took up goddamned pregnant whoring because you can't go back to the Dalish after that shit. And then she died giving birth to this much fucking awesome that I am, so I grew up with the whores. At least until they sold my sweet elven ass to the Crows, who tortured the fucking shit out of me and then gave me knives. Which I used which I used to kill my first true fucking love, when she didn't even need killing.
So now, one slip, and instead of fucking Loghain in a pile of money, I'm following your candy-ass around, and soaking up all the hate mail from the phobes. Meanwhile Leliana is up to her neck in hair pies, and Alistair is taking it eight ways to Sunday by m!Cousland in the mods! So fuck you!
No - seriously I will fuck you clear into next week if you want me to. Any race, any origin, any class, any gender, anywhere, any time. How do you like it? I know shit that's not even in the kama fucking sutra, and all of my massages come with release.
SO - bring it the hell on bitches.
Hello My Friends
Dec. 21st, 2010 10:33 pmAh, the digital age. It is so confusing, but so utterly thrilling. Millions upon millions of books and sources of information - all at my fingertips. I love it!
This place - it is so fascinating, thrilling.
Too bad there are so many rules.... bah. Fishing licenses!
But ready access to information, coffee and other various... nebulous wonders makes it worth it.
But really, someone should do something about those fishing licenses.
This place - it is so fascinating, thrilling.
Too bad there are so many rules.... bah. Fishing licenses!
But ready access to information, coffee and other various... nebulous wonders makes it worth it.
But really, someone should do something about those fishing licenses.
